It’s been a while since I’ve written, due to extreme business. EXTREME. In a matter of about two weeks we had three hospitalizations, a death, lots of sickness and a leaky dorm ceiling. This (for me, at least) was on top of preparing for and taking final exams and attending class. Finally though, things have balanced out, and life is good.
That’s a hard concept for me to grasp, balance is. I like to blame my lack of balance on my ADD (it’s self-diagnosed, but people, it’s pretty obvious I have it…), and the fact that I put everything I have into whatever interests me most at the moment. But I really would like to do a lot of things, and in order for me to do so, I need to find a balance. I need to manage my time. Easier said than done, I’m finding out. There are so many things that inspire me to move and act and pursue and dream and do and grow. How could there possibly be time for all of it??? I will MAKE time. 🙂
Along with the concept of balance, the whole idea of inspiration has been on my mind as well lately. Why do certain things inspire us more than others? Why do things speak to us? Why do we so often let the flame die out instead of exploring it and letting it grow? Music is such a huge part of my life, I swear I have like an organ inside or something that needs music to function. What if I had never explored the inspiration I find in music? I may have never tried to become a better singer, learn guitar or piano, and most definitely wouldn’t have went to college to study it further. I never even knew I could paint until high school. I liked art and how it speaks to people, and I wanted to try. And I produced a darn good painting, if I do say so myself! And now I love love love painting! I love all kinds of crafts! All because something inspired me and I ran with it.
What stops people, really? What keeps us from having and doing everything we ever wanted? What keeps people from dreaming in the first place? I am known for giving off a Disney-princess-with-her-head-in-the-clouds aura…but I’m discouraged sometimes by the way children are raised. I once read somewhere something about raising children. It said that when your child makes a silly request, like getting a pony in a house that was….not made for ponies….to not say,” No, honey, we have nowhere to put a pony.” I mean, it’s true though, right? Well this writer suggested going along with the idea and saying something like,” A pony?! Oh, that’d be fun! Where would we put it? Could it stay in your room?” And eventually the child will come to the conclusion that a pony is not a suitable house pet. But going along with the idea instead of shutting down their dream, you teach them to use their mind and imagination and grow. Nowdays I feel like we just shut down those dreams. I intend to have very imaginative kids. 🙂
Now, painting may or may not change your life. Music may or may not change your life. But there issomethingout there that speaks to you. I recently met our neighbor (we just moved a few months ago) who just graduated high school. She wants to go to college to learn how to start a non-profit organization and eventually run for senator or governor or something of the sort. That doesn’t speak to me, personally. But the fact that she’s pursuing what inspires her and what speaks to her made me happy inside. I felt a connection to her, because we both believe you should whole heartedly chase your dreams. Senator…that’s ambitious! I hope she gets it.
In a lot of my blogs I mention this whole idea of “doing what you love,” blah blah blah. But SERIOUSLY! I cannot imagine living a safe life of doing what will keep my life stable before trying and failing a million times to pursue something that speaks to me. It’s not just a career. Maybe you have a stable and safe career that you can tolerate but you do crazy things in life to keep it interesting. That’s great too! Personally, if I have to work my entire life, I will try with everything in me to make my career something that pushes me to grow as an individual and be inspired everyday.
That being said, there’s something else I’ve learned while contemplating these things. When I was younger, I would pray alllllllll the time that God would bless me and my talents and let me be famous or something so I could make a living doing what I love. I always dreamed of people knowing who I was and being interested in my daily (yet oh-so-interesting!) life adventures. I then felt this tug on my heart, as if God was saying, “What happens then? What is your life worth if it’s all about you?” It kind of stopped me in my tracks. That is so true. That would be such an empty, lonely life! I think that’s why a lot of superstars who live for themselves get so caught up in partying and drugs and sex. They act as if they are living the high life, but they’re lonely and empty because they aren’t giving back. I changed my prayer. I would love to be famous and make a living singing and travelling the world! But that has to be for fun and work. And mylifehas to be spent giving back in some way, no matter what my job ends up being.
This blog kind of ended up being a big rambling mess of rhetorical thinking…but I hope it inspired you to explore things that speak to you, and find a balance in your life so that you can do what you have to do, but also do things you love. If you don’t know where to start, start by thinking. If something inspires you, think about it for a while. Explore it. Try it. You never know where it might lead you!